Headline of the Day

Probably what *this* should be called.
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Rylinks
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Re: Headline of the Day

Post by Rylinks » Mon Dec 14, 2020 6:10 pm

id say it’s probably impossible if you don’t know about the subject matter

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Re: Headline of the Day

Post by Doug » Mon Dec 14, 2020 6:13 pm

Rylinks wrote: Mon Dec 14, 2020 6:10 pm they spend money on people who won’t grift it. this is quite hard!
I actually didn't parse this :supo:
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Re: Headline of the Day

Post by Dantes » Mon Dec 14, 2020 6:33 pm

Doug wrote: Mon Dec 14, 2020 6:09 pm
Rylinks wrote: Mon Dec 14, 2020 6:07 pm i think a guy who has spent a large amount of money and effort trying to eradicate polio is probably qualified to talk about how vaccines will slow the spread of a disease
Do you know what an executive producer does
I do.

Which is why I know that you have no idea what kind of a leader Bill Gates is. He gets heavily invested in what he's focused on, he's very hands on (legend has it the lower his fucks/minute ratio was the more impressed he was with your work). And he's been focused on public health and pandemics for the last decade.

He isn't just the money man.
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Re: Headline of the Day

Post by Doug » Mon Dec 14, 2020 6:49 pm

Dantes wrote: Mon Dec 14, 2020 6:33 pm Which is why I know that you have no idea what kind of a leader Bill Gates is.
A leader who will convince you to stay home!



I think you have to imagine a brass band playing in the background for this post to work
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Re: Headline of the Day

Post by Dantes » Mon Dec 14, 2020 6:57 pm

I was going to do a riff here on grief called "The Kübler-Ross five stages of Doug."


But I'm pretty certain it wouldn't be well received and, frankly, I just don't give a damn.
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Re: Headline of the Day

Post by Doug » Mon Dec 14, 2020 6:59 pm

I'm going to do a riff on Dantes literally saying that we should listen to Bill Gates because of how much money he spends, as soon as I think of a punchline
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Re: Headline of the Day

Post by Khaos » Mon Dec 14, 2020 6:59 pm

he meant invested as in, not monetarily

although obviously he is that too

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Re: Headline of the Day

Post by Doug » Mon Dec 14, 2020 7:00 pm

Khaos wrote: Mon Dec 14, 2020 6:59 pm he meant invested as in, not monetarily

although obviously he is that too
Freudian typing!
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Re: Headline of the Day

Post by Khaos » Mon Dec 14, 2020 7:01 pm

Doug wrote: Mon Dec 14, 2020 6:13 pm
Rylinks wrote: Mon Dec 14, 2020 6:10 pm they spend money on people who won’t grift it. this is quite hard!
I actually didn't parse this :supo:
send me $40,000 dollars and i can do it for you

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Re: Headline of the Day

Post by Khaos » Mon Dec 14, 2020 7:01 pm

double post!

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Re: Headline of the Day

Post by Doug » Mon Dec 14, 2020 7:02 pm

Khaos wrote: Mon Dec 14, 2020 7:01 pmdouble post!
I'm not paying for the second one
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Re: Headline of the Day

Post by Rylinks » Mon Dec 14, 2020 7:29 pm

Doug wrote: Mon Dec 14, 2020 6:13 pm
Rylinks wrote: Mon Dec 14, 2020 6:10 pm they spend money on people who won’t grift it. this is quite hard!
I actually didn't parse this :supo:
if you have a pile of money, and are trying to spend it on some cause, and you don't have any knowledge about the cause, you will probably end up buying a lot of fancy reports that look really good and make you feel good about spending the money, with not much actual results to show for it

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Re: Headline of the Day

Post by Doug » Mon Dec 14, 2020 7:30 pm

Rylinks wrote: Mon Dec 14, 2020 7:29 pm
Doug wrote: Mon Dec 14, 2020 6:13 pm
Rylinks wrote: Mon Dec 14, 2020 6:10 pm they spend money on people who won’t grift it. this is quite hard!
I actually didn't parse this :supo:
if you have a pile of money, and are trying to spend it on some cause, and you don't have any knowledge about the cause, you will probably end up buying a lot of fancy reports that look really good and make you feel good about spending the money, with not much actual results to show for it
Oh jaja
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Re: Headline of the Day

Post by Dantes » Mon Dec 14, 2020 9:55 pm

Rylinks wrote: Mon Dec 14, 2020 7:29 pm
Doug wrote: Mon Dec 14, 2020 6:13 pm
Rylinks wrote: Mon Dec 14, 2020 6:10 pm they spend money on people who won’t grift it. this is quite hard!
I actually didn't parse this :supo:
if you have a pile of money, and are trying to spend it on some cause, and you don't have any knowledge about the cause, you will probably end up buying a lot of fancy reports that look really good and make you feel good about spending the money, with not much actual results to show for it
The government's standard operating procedure.
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Re: Headline of the Day

Post by Doug » Tue Dec 15, 2020 9:23 pm

NFL Ratings Drop Leaves Networks Scrambling to Make Advertisers Whole
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Re: Headline of the Day

Post by Doug » Wed Dec 16, 2020 6:33 pm

Pennsylvania Health Department Issues Preferred COVID Orgy Regulations: Wear a Face Covering, Avoid Kissing, Wash Hands Often
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Re: Headline of the Day

Post by Monty » Wed Dec 16, 2020 6:57 pm

Standard orgy rules, then
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Re: Headline of the Day

Post by Khaos » Wed Dec 16, 2020 7:03 pm

do you not kiss in orgies? that kinda makes sense to me

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Re: Headline of the Day

Post by Dantes » Wed Dec 16, 2020 7:26 pm

Monty wrote: Wed Dec 16, 2020 6:57 pm Standard orgy rules, then
:rofl:
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Re: Headline of the Day

Post by seathesee » Thu Dec 17, 2020 2:22 am

weaker penis bones in otters linked to oil sands contaminants in new study
with love, your good friend, seathesee

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Re: Headline of the Day

Post by Doug » Thu Dec 17, 2020 5:51 pm

Five staffers reportedly quit after Tom Cruise launches another rant
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Re: Headline of the Day

Post by Skeletor » Thu Dec 17, 2020 8:07 pm

Launches another rant sounds kinda like launch as in release

Tom Cruise releases another rant
wow, [you]. that all sounds terrible. i hope it gets better for you

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Re: Headline of the Day

Post by Doug » Thu Dec 17, 2020 8:10 pm

Skeletor wrote: Thu Dec 17, 2020 8:07 pm Launches another rant sounds kinda like launch as in release

Tom Cruise releases another rant
I'm the only important one on that stage
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Re: Headline of the Day

Post by Skeletor » Thu Dec 17, 2020 8:19 pm

Tom Cruise wakes up with a raging rant
wow, [you]. that all sounds terrible. i hope it gets better for you

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Re: Headline of the Day

Post by the_zoomies » Fri Dec 18, 2020 2:38 am

Doug wrote: Mon Dec 14, 2020 5:57 pm
seathesee wrote: Mon Dec 14, 2020 4:43 pm
Doug wrote: Mon Dec 14, 2020 2:59 pm The truth is that Bill Gates isn't qualified to give thoughtful answers on medical forecasts, and what he should be saying is please don't destroy the economy just to benefit me and Jeff
tbf, i would imagine hes more qualified than 99% of the people who listen to him/hear him talk about it.
Knowing more than the audience is a criteria for a magician
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Re: Headline of the Day

Post by ToadBrews » Fri Dec 18, 2020 12:23 pm

Skeletor wrote: Thu Dec 17, 2020 8:07 pm Launches another rant sounds kinda like launch as in release

Tom Cruise releases another rant
Tom Cruise launches new scientology rant DLC for Cyberpunk 2077, available exclusively to Amazon Prime members

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Re: Headline of the Day

Post by Rylinks » Sat Dec 19, 2020 11:12 pm

Eastern Australia covered under huge amounts of snake-infested sea foam

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Re: Headline of the Day

Post by Shiny Days » Tue Dec 22, 2020 11:57 pm

Roaring 2020s will be post-Covid vaccine 'sex (securities fraud)-fest' and 'era of vice and indulgence'

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Re: Headline of the Day

Post by Shiny Days » Tue Dec 22, 2020 11:57 pm

great news. we're going back to the eighties

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Re: Headline of the Day

Post by Doug » Wed Dec 23, 2020 1:36 am

Biden: 'Our Darkest Days Are Ahead'
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