silly thoughts

Probably what *this* should be called.
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Re: silly thoughts

Post by Doug » Mon Oct 25, 2021 9:07 pm

The hunger is unceasing
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Ashenai
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Re: silly thoughts

Post by Ashenai » Tue Oct 26, 2021 2:00 am

Khaos wrote: Mon Oct 25, 2021 6:52 pm he said, if people are so concerned about global warming maybe they should stop eating so many animals. and i guess he's not wrong
It's one of the highest-impact things we could do, yeah.

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Re: silly thoughts

Post by Khaos » Tue Oct 26, 2021 2:38 pm

vishnu had it right this whole time

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Re: silly thoughts

Post by Doug » Tue Oct 26, 2021 2:58 pm

So do we finish off the cows, pigs and chickens first, or do we let them run free
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Re: silly thoughts

Post by groff_enthusiast » Tue Nov 02, 2021 5:23 pm

Rylinks wrote: Mon Oct 25, 2021 1:33 pm if someone asks when you were born after you say you don't believe in astrology, lie
Ashenai wrote: Sat Jul 16, 2022 5:08 pmoh no

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Re: silly thoughts

Post by Doug » Wed Dec 01, 2021 1:38 am

Are you aware that your own daughter brought Burke Devlin in here? Made him feel right at home
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Re: silly thoughts

Post by Ashenai » Wed Dec 01, 2021 11:33 am

I don't ever say I don't believe in something, it always leads to a boring argument and you look like an ass if you win. I just go "I'm not sure... I have my doubts, but I've seen some very weird things." Then I try to look haunted and refuse to talk any more about it.

The first time I used this strategy was when the 6-year-old daughter of my apartment's previous owners asked me if I believed in fairies and I panicked. It worked well with her, so I tried it with adults. Worked well with them, too.

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Re: silly thoughts

Post by Jeb Bush 2012 » Wed Dec 01, 2021 1:55 pm

do you believe in a thing called love

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Re: silly thoughts

Post by Ashenai » Wed Dec 01, 2021 3:25 pm

looking extra haunted over here

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Re: silly thoughts

Post by Skeletor » Wed Dec 01, 2021 5:18 pm

Rylinks wrote: Mon Oct 25, 2021 1:33 pm if someone asks when you were born after you say you don't believe in astrology, lie
well yeah, i wasn't born after i said i don't believe in astrology at all. i was born way before that
wow, [you]. that all sounds terrible. i hope it gets better for you

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Re: silly thoughts

Post by Crunchums » Wed Dec 01, 2021 5:51 pm

at some point there must have been a pregnant woman who cared about astrology who was giving birth around a date where the signs flip and was worried about it
"hey we need to induce labor now"
"no please not yet just another two hours i don't want to give birth to a scorpio!!"
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Re: silly thoughts

Post by Ashenai » Wed Dec 01, 2021 6:00 pm

Crunchums wrote: Wed Dec 01, 2021 5:51 pm at some point there must have been a pregnant woman who cared about astrology who was giving birth around a date where the signs flip and was worried about it
"hey we need to induce labor now"
"no please not yet just another two hours i don't want to give birth to a scorpio!!"
Supposedly there was a lot of that going on around new year's eve 1999.

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Re: silly thoughts

Post by pterrus » Wed Dec 01, 2021 7:15 pm

I have a friend who was born on NYE and said his mom induced when she did specifically for tax purposes.

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Re: silly thoughts

Post by Khaos » Wed Dec 01, 2021 7:34 pm

Crunchums wrote:at some point there must have been a pregnant woman who cared about astrology who was giving birth around a date where the signs flip and was worried about it
"hey we need to induce labor now"
"no please not yet just another two hours i don't want to give birth to a scorpio!!"
i feel like those people would try to get pregnant at a specific time?

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Re: silly thoughts

Post by Crunchums » Wed Dec 01, 2021 8:35 pm

Khaos wrote:i feel like those people would try to get pregnant at a specific time?
yeah but even if they succeeded at that then maybe the baby is early or late
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Re: silly thoughts

Post by Doug » Tue Dec 07, 2021 2:18 pm

A can of evaporated milk, and the art on the can is a desert with a cow skull in the sand
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Re: silly thoughts

Post by Crunchums » Tue Dec 07, 2021 4:06 pm

i wonder whether i would recognize a cow skull in a lineup of skulls of other similar animals
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Re: silly thoughts

Post by Doug » Thu Dec 09, 2021 4:40 pm

A comedy show called That's Our Stalin, in which Stalin is an Archie Bunkerlike figure who gets pushback on his beliefs -- except that unlike Archie Bunker, Stalin purges the people who were disagreeing with him

And then his son-in-law says, "You did it again," at the end of every episode
It's your turn in Cthulhu Wars
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It's your turn in Demon Wars
It's your turn in Wall Street Wars

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Re: silly thoughts

Post by Doug » Fri Dec 10, 2021 12:24 am

I'm going to write a script called "Omicron Man" where it's just like Omega Man except Charleton Heston is a man trying to survive in a world where everyone else is also alive

that's a good joke i wrote
you're going to tell your kids that joke one day and you're going to lie and tell them you made that joke up and it's okay, I understand why you're gonna lie, it's a good joke and i forgive you
It's your turn in Cthulhu Wars
It's your turn in Squirrel Wars
It's your turn in Demon Wars
It's your turn in Wall Street Wars

http://devilsbiscuit.com/

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Re: silly thoughts

Post by Crunchums » Fri Dec 10, 2021 11:39 pm

mangus carlsen (and then it's a big chungus equivalent photoshop of magnus)
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Re: silly thoughts

Post by Crunchums » Thu Dec 16, 2021 8:00 pm

(a guy finishes a brief presentation about how for environmental reasons people should stop using paper towels after washing their hands)
me: pff, next you're going to be telling me i should only use a single square of toilet paper
him: well hold on now *as he says this he holds up his hands in a placatory gesture and they are wet and have poop on them*
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Re: silly thoughts

Post by Doug » Fri Dec 17, 2021 7:02 pm

It turns out the national treasure was Nicolas Cage all along
It's your turn in Cthulhu Wars
It's your turn in Squirrel Wars
It's your turn in Demon Wars
It's your turn in Wall Street Wars

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Re: silly thoughts

Post by Khaos » Fri Dec 17, 2021 7:06 pm

oh im fucking stupid

in my defense i haven't seen that movie

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Re: silly thoughts

Post by pterrus » Sun Dec 19, 2021 4:55 pm

Baby, external temps are off-nominal low

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Re: silly thoughts

Post by Crunchums » Fri Dec 24, 2021 3:50 pm

greek gods are handing out punishments. Prometheus, Sisyphus, Tantalus, etc
new guy comes in and some minor god reads out the charges and they're absolutely heinous; mass murder is the least of them
the gods gasp and know that they have to come up with a truly brutal punishment
they come up with: every morning someone hands him a used collander, and he has to clean it until there is zero visible residue
(it would be more logical if there were some punishment for not finishing the job by nightfall or something, but i think it scans better without that additional complexity)
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Re: silly thoughts

Post by Doug » Fri Dec 24, 2021 7:37 pm

Can I tweak your joke

Sisyphus is being punished
The gods arrive and tell him, we're all Roman gods now. No more rolling a rock uselessly up a hill -- we have something we need you to do instead. Do you want the good news or the bad news first
Sisyphus says, good news then bad news
The Roman gods say, instead of rolling a boulder, each morning you have to clean our dishes from the previous night. The bad news is that they're all encrusted with dry spaghetti sauce
It's your turn in Cthulhu Wars
It's your turn in Squirrel Wars
It's your turn in Demon Wars
It's your turn in Wall Street Wars

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Re: silly thoughts

Post by Crunchums » Fri Dec 24, 2021 11:49 pm

Doug wrote:Can I tweak your joke
always
that is a better way to format that joke
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Re: silly thoughts

Post by Ashenai » Sat Dec 25, 2021 11:37 am

  • [you]
Spoiler!
a bullet with your name on it

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Re: silly thoughts

Post by Crunchums » Wed Dec 29, 2021 6:24 pm

In your fantasy, dream about me
And all that we could do with this emulsion

(i think there's a thread for fake song lyrics that DS made somewhere but i don't remember where; maybe on GG?)
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Re: silly thoughts

Post by Crunchums » Mon Jan 03, 2022 4:18 am

Feel Like Makin' Love by Bad Company but instead of "makin' love" it's "jerking off"
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